Leakage, as you might be aware, is a woman’s WORST enemy. Procter & Gamble have built an empire from the manufacture of products that purport to prevent leakage. But Kotex and Always have yet to come out with something that works on ROOFS.

What I need right now is some serious leakage protection…like a Really, Really, Really-Maxi Maxi Pad. Big enough to sop up the entire sky on those ‘heavy days’.

Believe me, PMS has nothing on what I’m feeling now. My roof is leaking. There is a bucket on my poor mother-in-law’s bed (as well as in three other places). I have slit the ceiling in her bedsitting room in several spots with an xacto-blade so the water would run out instead of making huge bubbles in the drywall. My husband is going to kill me when he gets home from work.
Nine years and two days of marriage—will this leak spell the end for us?

Oh, and it gets even better. I’ve been using a turkey baster to suction the water off the roof.

Now, before you spit out your drink laughing hysterically, let me just say that I had to quickly improvise, and son-of-a-gun, it actually seems to work pretty good, because the water is too shallow for a cup to be of any use up there.

And I’m not using just any old turkey baster—this is my special Mackie turkey baster, which I picked up at a NAMM Convention in Anaheim about 10 or so years ago. Mackie is a company that makes mixing boards and other pro audio gear.
Usually, trade show swag is useless. But not today…

The guys who are working on our patio are going to have some good stories when they get home tonight—telling their friends all about the crazy lady on her roof with a turkey baster.
Actually, they were probably feeling a bit of pity for me as I ranted about the yard, screaming repetitive expletives and raving on about how it figures this would happen on a long weekend…
...and how it figures that it would be right when we’ve parted with any extra money we might have had to get it fixed…
... and how it figures it waited until the @#$%^ oak floor was in before unleashing its fury upon me.
One of them said they should take a picture (of me on the roof), and since I haven’t posted any photos of myself here yet, I let him have my camera. Here’s me with my trusty turkey baster:

technorati tags: houseblog, DIY, roofing, leaking+roof, desperate+housewife

You may be wondering about the lack of activity here on the blog…well, I’ve been keeping busy—just not here. A lot has been happening…like interlocking brick!

It’s a mucky job, but I am liking the idea of no more sand coming into the house. Yes, most people would have opted to finish siding the place first, but the weather’s still too cold, rainy and damp for painting shingles.

”

I’m heading back outside—there’s O-pipe to deal with (drainage), lots more brick to lay (there’s a bit of a retaining wall happening to deal with a yard that slopes upwards from the back of the house), and later there will be muddy laundry and probably a tub to clean.

Oh…friggin’ great…Martha just informed me her ceiling is leaking. Again. Gotta go.

This is shaping up to be a fine long weekend!

technorati tags: houseblog, DIY, landscaping, futility

With Mother’s Day just around the corner, I thought I’d share some of my most treasured gifts with you.

My mother was a wonderful gardener, and especially adored tulips. In 1997, the year I was married, she began giving me an assortment of her favourite tulip bulbs to plant in my garden each fall.

When spring comes, their magnificence astounds me and I want to drown in them, for their beauty is so exquisite and fleeting…as ephemeral as the gift from my mother was, for I only received this annual present three times.

Even though mom passed away in the fall of 2000, she manages to find a way to visit me every Mother’s Day.

With the exception of the first photo (taken on Monday), all of these pictures were taken in my garden around dinnertime on Wednesday.

The first tulips mom ever gave me were ‘Blushing Beauty’—a spectacular pale yellow tulip with blush pink veining on 30” stems. Like most of my bulbs, these are in their third garden—having moved with me twice now—and it’s the first time since we’ve lived in this house that the rabbits didn’t get them (thank you, neighbours who now have dogs).

Seeing them in bloom is particularly satisfying; at my wedding I carried a simple bouquet of just these tulips, with sheer green organza ribbon wrapped around their incredibly long stems.

I love that moment just before a tulip unfurls. I think it’s when the flower is at its most beautiful, and parrot tulips (like the ones above) really have a way of capturing it best, don’t you think? They have this fantastic, almost surreal look about them.

Happy Mother’s Day, everyone.
And thanks, mom, for the most awesome gift ever.

technorati tags: houseblog, DIY, gardening, home+renovation

My daughter’s primary school held a memorial today for a twelve year-old grade seven student whose young life was taken far too soon in a tragic house fire this past February.

To honour Kevin, students planted a mighty oak tree, which they dedicated to his memory. The quiet, simple celebration was marked by poetry readings from Kevin’s classmates and teacher, and a musical tribute by the school choir.

The choir sang Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’, which I found an unexpected, yet perfect choice of material…and I discovered how difficult it is to focus a camera while you are crying.

_{Live thy Life,
Young and old,
Like yon oak,
Bright in spring,
Living gold;}

Summer-rich
Then; and then
Autumn-changed,
Soberer hued
Gold again.

All his leaves
Fall’n at length,
Look, he stands,
Trunk and bough,
Naked strength.

“The Oak”, by Alfred Lord Tennyson